2/3/14

book club * session one.

Yes, I know that I said I would post every Thursday for the book club but this past week was a little hectic and I was going through some options for the book club. For this book, my roommates and I will be actually reading it together and then I'll be sharing our thoughts and favorite bits here on A Tiny Traveler!
We'll do a few chapters at a time, but for now here are chapter one's recap and results:

Chapter One: Mad Enough To Change
-pg. 4: 
"Something's wrong with us for us to value ourselves so little. Our culture has thrown us under the bus. We have a fissure down our spines, and boy, does it need fixing."

-pg. 5: 
"Women want to be told that they are captivating. That they're beautiful. Desirable. I won't deny that. What woman wouldn't thrive under that kind of steady affirmation? But here's my question: What if no one tells us that? Can we still find a way to be okay? Or what if he says it because he's supposed to, but to be honest, he's not feeling it? Are we hopeless? What if a man is not captivated by us? What if he doesn't think we're particularly beautiful? Or, understandably, maybe just not every day? Are we only secure on his "on" days? What if he loves us but is not quite as captivated by us as he used to be? What if his computer is full of images of what he finds attractive, and we're lightyears from it? What if we're seventy-five and every ounce of desirability is long behind us? Can we still feel adequate in our media driven society? Or is it only possible if our man has gone blind? ...Honestly, is there no validation for our womanhood apart from a man?"

-pg. 6
(paraphrased)
Men are not the only source of security/insecurity for women. The book is starting here because a woman with an unhealthy heart toward men will, without fail, be unhealthy in lots of other areas, some of which extend beyond her sexuality. Men are not the problem. It's what women try to get from them that is. We're trying to get our security from the opposite gender (and they don't really have much to spare). The current culture is just as merciless on men as it is on women. Men don't want the pressure of being in charge of our sense of value; they have their own insecurities to worry about. This isn't to come down on men at all either! Women need to know where their true security should come from!
Christy Nockels says, "Men are not drawn to needy hysterical, needy women."

-pg. 11
"As if the battle isn't hard enough, we sabotage ourselves, submerging ourselves with self-condemnation like a submarine filling with water. How often do we think to ourselves, I should be handling this better? So is it okay to ask why we're not? Like, what's the root of an ugly knee-jerk reaction? God did not create static beings when He breathed a soul into Adam. Dynamic creatures that we are, we are ever changing and ever spiraling up-- or down. Please don't misunderstand. God forbid that we live life in a vicious cycle of gaining ground and losing it.
Listen carefully: the enemy of our souls has more to gain by our setbacks than by our succumbing to an initial assault. The former is infinitely more demoralizing. Far more liable to make us feel hopeless and tempt us to quit. We can rationalize- even truthfully- that an initial assault caught us by surprise. Setbacks, on the other hand, just make us feel weak and stupid: I should have conquered this by now. 

-Psalm 30:6-7

-pg. 12
"I'm forever wanting to go someplace with God. I forget that in order to really want to go, something has to happen to make me want to leave where I am. Maybe we're all just sick of taking three steps forward and two steps back. And if we don't lose that ground, aren't we on our way somewhere new? Willing to take three more steps- even if we lose two?

-1 Corinthians 10:13

Insecurity is a terrible companion. It vows to keep us from getting hurt or forgotten. Insecurity invades every place in our lives and has sold us out more than we can count. It's time to get emotionally healthy and choose our lifelong companions better. Insecurity needs to get dumped!
Take this quest for real, lasting, soul-changing security.

*So what do you think? I am really enjoying it so far! For those of you participating and you don't have a copy of the book, I'd love to hear your thoughts on the excerpts posted above. I think that this is going to be a journey that many of us need to embark on. Won't you join?

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